Has There Really Been A Rise In The Far Right?

Many terms have changed their meaning over the past few years: diversity, racism, oppression, “woman”. 10 years ago the term woman was used to describe someone who was born with a vagina, had xx chromosomes and was as emotionally stable as Japan during a tsunami.

Nowadays being a woman is something anyone can be just as long as you buy a wig, wear a dress and threaten to destroy anyone’s career who disagrees with you.

The same thing has happened to the term “far right”. When I was growing up “far right” meant people who were white nationalists, hated ethnic minorities and openly supported Hitler. And they were never shy about telling you they were racist. In fact they were proud of it.

I lived in a part of South London which had a very real problem with white nationalist groups such as the BNP and the National Front. Growing up in the shadow of white supremacist groups had a profound effect on my life.

My mum is from Venezuela. She wanted to call me Francisco Jaime. Francisco in English is Francis and Jaime means “part of the vagina that breaks during sex”.

Because we lived in an area where racism was rampant my dad insisted that my name should be Francis. And I’m so grateful to him because going to a south London comprehensive school was much easier now that I had the name of a middle class white woman. I was gender fluid before it was cool.

The good thing was that my mum never really understood the whole politics thing.I remember she once got handed a leaflet for the BNP and asked them if they had one in Spanish.

Nowadays, the term “far right” had evolved to anyone you disagree with. Donald Trump, Nigel Farage, Boris Johnson, Liz Truss, Priti Patel, Suella Braverman. I doubt Hitler would approve of Suella Braverman. A brown woman who married a Jewish man. Therefore producing brown Jewish kids. And for those nerds going…

“Erm Francis, Jewishness is passed down through the mother’s side. Therefore they’re not Jews.”

I’m no World War 2 historian but I doubt Hitler would’ve said. “You know what Henry, you’ve got a point. They’re not proper Jews. Let them go.”.

And it’s not just people, the Guardian have come out and said things like “exercise” is far right. Now I’ve had a few PE teachers in my time who’ve shown some fascistic tendencies.

One PE teacher once demanded I do 10 press ups in 60 seconds! 10 press ups! Only the SS would demand someone do 10 press ups in 60 seconds. This is the sort of body fascism that Goebbels would have approved of. Although the Nazis were national SOCIALISTS and I don’t think I’ve ever seen a socialist who can do more than 5 press ups.

The Guardian also claimed the countryside is racist. And of course it is. You don’t see many black sheep there, do you?

But there’s an important point to all of this. Because if everything is “far right” then nothing is. Which is a very real problem because the far right still exist and they are of course still a danger. So when newspapers like the Guardian tell me the far right are on the rise in Germany as someone who bares more than a passing resemblance to a Jewish man who happens to be halfway through a transition I start to get a little nervous.

If they’re going to start taking away the Jews. I’m going to be in the back of the van. Because no one believes that my mum is Venezuelan. And even if they do. I doubt those are the type of genetics they want hanging about the place.

Plus it’s not as if the Germans don’t have a history of this stuff.

And now I’m seeing a whole host of “far right” parties become ever more popular across Europe and I’m getting concerned because a lot of those boys embraced fascism back in the 30s a little too quickly for my liking.

Take the French whose resistance to the Nazis melted faster than one of their cheeses at room temperature. Never, ever trust a Frenchman.

Only joking, I don’t trust anyone that speaks French and that includes the Belgians. Flemish isn’t a language, it’s basically angry gargling.

All of these parties are talking about limiting immigration, prioritising their citizens and have anti Islam policies. Marine Le Pen has spoken openly about banning women from wearing the hijab. Which she says is a symbol of a totalitarian ideology.

I don’t agree with banning the hijab. I think adults should be allowed to wear what they want. Telling people what they can and can’t wear strikes me as authoritarian. But I also believe that immigration is currently unsustainable and needs to be brought down.

In some polls 40% of French people have said that they agree with her on certain policies. Does that mean 40% of France is far right? Or does it simply mean that they’ve had enough of mainstream political parties who they feel have abandoned them? Many of her economic policies would be classified as left wing.

A whole host of these parties are sweeping to power across Europe or at the very least becoming serious contenders. And I’m torn because I think it’s great that new political entities are challenging the status quo which has become stale and lacking in ideas but I also don’t want people to be told what to wear.

And since no one can agree with what far right actually means. What happens when we get someone rise to prominence who actually is far right? What do we do then? We do the only thing we can do. Go on social media and moan about it.

The only problem is New York Times articles talking about why separating black sheep and white sheep is modern day fascism will be far more popular.

Because writing about nonsense will always engage people far more than telling the truth.

Which is why my next monologue will be about why naturists and the SS are one and the same thing. 6 million views! Stay tuned!